Tales of Adoration
by CruCru-chan
Summary: Quantum physics, that's easy. Chemical equations, simple. Mathematical expressions through imagery numbers, piece of cake. Trying to understand your irrational attachment to your best friend, more complicated than one might conclude. When did the lines between idolization - and - affection, yearning, and love, become so blurred? (AU where Genis is 15 at the start of the journey).


**Complications of Realization**

 _I'm rackin my brain,_

 _trying to comprehend, how,_

 _for some unknown reason,_

 _our status will remain as friends.- The Spill Canvas_

* * *

The night air could not have been colder, though the fire was only a few feet away. The small, lilac-haired elf, tugged his blanket up towards his chin as he shivered quietly. He laid there thinking, pondering, while the starry sky gazed back at him. It seemed that the concept of an endless universe was mundane compared to the thoughts brewing in his own mind.

 _This isn't right!_ He squeezed his eyes tightly closed, in a failed attempt to erase his thoughts. _He's my best friend! Why do I feel this way, why do these thoughts keep recurring?_

He shifted on his side towards the fire, staring at the silhouette on the other side. The chocolate haired boy beyond the flames was leaning on one of his sheathed blades, snoring lightly.

 _You moron, your suppose to be keeping watch,_ Genis couldn't help but chuckle softly to himself. _Lloyd, I'm the younger one, you should be taking more responsibility, and yet, I always feel like I'm the one that has to watch after you..._

With that thought brought yet another setback, _younger._ He knew that Lloyd was two years older than him, though he didn't act it. Making the gap between his wishful dream-like fantasies even more expansive.

 _Who am I kidding!? Like age is the main issue anyway. It's impossible. He doesn't feel the same way I do, at least not on the same level. I'm his "little buddy" nothing more than that._ The constant bickering with himself only furthered his frustration. _It's stupid for me to have these feelings to begin with; he's your friend idiot! YOUR FRIEND!_

The young elf kicked feverishly in frustration under his covers, "Ahhh! You're so stupid Genis!"

The loud shout of frustration startled the boy currently occupying Genis's thoughts. He awoke completely off guard, hastily jumping to his feet with both swords unsheathed, ready to defend his allies from whatever was lurking in the dark.

"Who's there!?" The brown-haired warrior demanded, twirling one blade in hand ready for an attack, while defensively positioning the other. His eyes darted over the area checking for anything out of place. But there seemed to be no threat insight. His eyes finally fell on his lilac-haired friend. Genis was sitting up-right, hair messily obscuring his eyes with both hands covering his mouth, hiding most of his beat-red face.

"Oh.. Genis, you okay?" Lloyd prompted, a hint of worry in his voice.

Genis quickly nodded in response, looking in the opposite direction, trying to hide his burning face from Lloyds view.

 _Oh my Goddess! You have an IQ of 220 do you not know the difference between thinking and vocal verbalization!?_ He continued to punish himself mentally, while keeping his eyes aloof and face towards the ground. Yet he also couldn't help but feel Lloyd's concerned gaze gnawing at the back of his head.

"Genis..?" Lloyd's voice brought guilt to the boy averting his eyes.

"I.. I'm fine. Ju.. Just a.. bad dream is all." Genis finally spurted out, stumbling on his own words from nervousness, all the while continuing to avoid Lloyd's gaze.

Lloyd sighed with relief, returning to his position at the fire place. "You had me worried, you know? Thought some monster wander into camp." He laughed while rubbing the sleep from his eyes and giving a big yawn. "Guess I dosed off, you won't tell anyone, will you Genis?" Lloyd probed jokingly.

"No, I won't." Genis answered bleakly, while tracing the crest upon his hand, to wrapped up in his own thoughts to be paying much attention. Ironically the thing he was ignoring was the very person he couldn't get out of his head. _Can't you give it up Lloyd? I'm flustered enough for having these thoughts and now you caught me in the act, I don't feel like talking! Just go back to bed, pleassse,_ Genis pleaded inwardly.

The lack of emotion from Genis concerned Lloyd, normally the elf could easily catch his sarcasm, "Are you sure you're okay?" leaning on his side Lloyd tried to get a better look at his friend. It didn't go unnoticed, at least not to Lloyd, that Genis's behavior was not of the norm. They had hardly spoken to one another in the past two weeks and when they did, it was always awkward and short. He thought that the pressure of their journey was the cause, but he couldn't be sure. The distance had been eating away at Lloyd, he wanted answers and now seemed like the best time for questioning.

Genis steadied himself in an attempt to regain his nerve, once he felt confident enough he threw the hair from his face and glanced in his friend's direction, giving him a small smile for reassurance. "I'm fine Lloyd, really, I'm just sleepy is all."

"Oh... alright then," Lloyd returned the smile, but only half-heartedly, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was out of place. _What's up with this kid and why won't he tell me what's wrong, he normally tells me everything._ Lloyd bit his lip in concentration, trying to find the answer to a problem unstated.

"Genis..." Lloyd pressed onward, pausing for recognition, but only silence was returned. He watched as Genis drew circles in the dirt, his deep blue eyes once again nailed to the ground. The camp fire played shadows on his pale face, which only seemed to magnify the mystery of what Genis had to hide.

"Listen Genis, you've just been kind of distant lately and I just wanted to tal-"

"Goodnight Lloyd."

Lloyd was quickly cut off by Genis's hasty retreat, as the elf rolled over, pulling his blanket over his head.

Lloyd sighed inwardly, running a hand through his dark brown hair. _I guess we'll talk later then._ He thought in defeat, laying back against the cold ground with his swords against his chest.

"Goodnight Genis," he whispered.

That was the last thing Genis heard from Lloyd that night, besides his snoring, which followed in a matter of seconds.

 _Wow, really Lloyd? That has to be a new record, even for you. I feel sooo "safe" knowing you're watching over us._ Genis chided, a smirk etching its way on his face. _I can't believe I fell for a complete moron,_ he wiggled himself back around to get a view of Lloyd sleeping, _A complete and utterly beautiful, strong, and daring moron._ Genis shook his head in disbelief, _how did I get myself in this mess in the first place?_

Genis began to ponder that very question, until his eyes became heavy and breathing steady as the flicker of the camp fire and uneven breaths from the boy beyond lured him into sleep.

Deep down Genis knew the answer to that question, the problem occurred a fortnight ago in the desert Triet Inn, where he shared the same bed with his best friend. Something not unheard of and completely normal considering the situation, but the things that occurred was what pushed him over the edge. But that circumstance only made it clear how he felt for his friend. The root of the problem was before the desert inn, it all started back in their small village of Iselia, that's when he truly noticed Lloyd for what he really was, not just his idiotic friend, but a young man that he idolized.

* * *

 **Notes:** I've always been a fan of the Tales of series and Symphonia has continued to be my favorite. I started writing this a few years ago and stopped and now recently decided to start back up again. Thanks for reading and if you enjoyed keep an eye out for more. :)

 **Update:** As I started writing the second chapter (third since this is considered a prologue currently) I began to notice just how large this story would end up being. As I am a rather busy individual due to university I knew I couldn't handle a 20 chapter story. So I'm currently scraping/reworking a few things. A new chapter should be on the horizon!


End file.
